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Monday, September 6, 2010

thisis Time to Bond... James Bond?

Hello ScoFans!

"It's easy to bond over hating something together. The Internet is total proof of that"
Codex - The Guild (Series 3, Episode 2)

As anyone who follows me on Twitter knows, I have been watching quite a bit of The Guild the last few weeks. Yes, that's right, I've been spamming your feeds. What, you wanna fight about it?

Anyway, I heard that quote and I realised "She's right. Blogging shouldn't be about entertaining people or making them laugh. It shouldn't be about sharing our lives or connecting with people. No, the Internet is about people who hate things joining together and complaining about those things."

Okay, so there's also quite a lot of porn on the Internet too, but other than porn, the Internet is mostly about hatred.

So I thought, this week, we'd take the opportunity to do some real bonding and strengthen our electronic connection by hating a list of socially acceptable things to hate, collectively shaking our fists and venting our frustration at the below listed things.

Things like cancer. I mean, cancer, what's with all the killing people, really. It's a damn inconvenience.

And also, that .1% of germs that no household cleaner is able to kill. Damn you invincible germs! It's your fault we get sick!

Oh, and cleaning products manufacturers. For years you've told us about your "new and improved" formula, but you've also been telling us your product kills 99.9% of germs. If you're not killing any more germs, how exactly is your product "improved"?

And politicians. I hate them so much.

And don't even get me started on lawyers.

Oh, and what about bad drivers. Am I right? Don't bad drivers suck?

And then there's teams that beat the Essendon Football Club. I know none of you know nothing about the AFL, but you do know me, and you like me, and you want me to be happy.. right?

... at least.. you don't want me to be unhappy..

And what is the deal with mean people? Don't they get that we all hate them? Seriously people, a bit of kindness goes a long way.

Unemployment. That's another bad thing. Because not only is unemployment bad, but when people get really desperate it also leads them to burglary and drug trafficking, which is also bad. That's a three for the price of one right there.

While we're on the subject of crime, rapists, pedophiles and murderers. What is your problem? Most criminals for that matter. You make so many peoples lives unpleasant. We don't like you either.

Bad TV shows also suck. Especially bad TV shows that are advertised a lot, so you're reminded of your anger towards the show in each commercial break, and that just makes you angrier.

Ummm.. what else is pretty awful?...

People who spam your Twitter feed. We don't care what show your watching, either say something interesting or don't tweet at all. (Yes, sometimes I do hate myself, just a little bit)

People who use their Facebook status to seek attention.

People who say w00t.

People who don't spell properly.

People who don't get it.

PeoPleE wHo TyPe lIke ThiS.

People who use social networking to constantly remind us all how much they love their significant other. If you love them so much, get off the damned Internet and spend some time with them.

People who be hating on my game.

People who diss my peeps.

People who are annoying.

People who complain too much.

People who are always happy.

Noisy children.

Crying babies.

Dusting.

Ironing.

Domestic violence.

And of course, Hugh Jackman.

Well, that's all I can come up with. How about you? Do you have anything else we can hate together?

Thinking of you always

ScoMan

PS There is the chance to impress me and earn some serious ScoPoints here.

29 comments:

  1. The lure of ScoPoints doesn't do it for me anymore. I've convinced I've earned many, and yet still have nothing to show for it. And yet I'll still play along and add;

    - large slow flies that buzz around your head
    - annoying repetitive noises
    - people to purposely wear "comfortable" shoes
    - people in the elevator that clearly ate a lot of garlic the night before

    ReplyDelete
  2. Are there really, really, really, really bad drivers in Australia? Because to a lot of people out here on the West Coast, Utah is full of the worst drivers on the planet. But, to Utahans, Californians are the worst drivers. Now that is just a lie--Californians are clearly a bajillion times better at driving than Utahans. So, to add to your list, I don't like liars.

    Secondly, I don't like greedy people. Like...tall people. I mean, come on! Share your height! So selfish...

    ReplyDelete
  3. I'm not hating Hugh Jackman with anyone!!

    also, WOOOOOT!

    ReplyDelete
  4. People who chew gum like a cow.

    Love this, thanks!

    PS: Following you on Twitter now.
    I am @thatgalkiki

    Christine

    ReplyDelete
  5. I hate twitter. I have an account but haven't been there in months. And your hate list is so long, you don't have time to love, or like, or be pleased or...other stuff. Hate on, Sco!

    ReplyDelete
  6. In the name of bonding, you didn't leave a lot to add since you covered pretty much everything I hate...but here are some more:
    - dentist's drills - how come nobody has invented something better and less frightening?
    - people talking in the movie theater...especially the one that has seen the movie and is adding commentary
    - the ultra-thin-perfect-body friend constantly asking: do I look fat?

    ReplyDelete
  7. I love The Guild! I met Codex, Tink, and Clara at a DVD signing recently. Such nice girls! (Yes, even Tink.)

    I hate celebrities that are famous only for being rich and releasing sex tapes and haven't even had the decency to put out a horrifyingly bad movie or music single before getting a reality show.

    I hate receipts. From the store, the bank, anywhere. It's just this stupid little piece of paper you're now forced to do something with.

    I don't hate Hugh Jackman. But I do hate Hugh Laurie.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Well I think your list covered it all except for knobs who think their own shit don't stink and accountants......................................

    And I love Hugh Jackman!!!!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  9. Servers in fast foods who are just grumpy about everything... they ruin my day... and my excitement to eat burger and fries... I know they count as annoying people, but their job is to smile at customers.

    And people who type "u" instead of "you," and "hu" instead of "who." Again, I know they count as annoying people, but I want to point them out.

    What are ScoPoints?? =|

    ReplyDelete
  10. LOL! Best post I have read all week. "a damn inconvenience" so funny! Hugh Jackman... ha ha! So many funny parts. Nicely played, ScoMan.

    ReplyDelete
  11. - People who can't indicate on roundabouts.
    - People who use text talk when there's plenty of room to type the full word.
    - People who put others down to make themselves feel better.
    - Homophobic people.
    - Fred Nile.
    - Tony Abbott.
    - John Howard.
    - Actually the entire Liberal party!

    ReplyDelete
  12. - People who jump on the Freo Dockers Bandwagon
    - People who try and give me Mother Guilt
    - Husbands that can't hang out the washing properly
    - My Son's white school shirts - come on...WHITE!!!
    - Having to let my 18 month old feed himself and have Weetbix up my walls

    They arn't very cool or glamourous but I'm hating them in my world!!!

    ReplyDelete
  13. I never really thought about the internet being a place for haters...but not that you mention it....I must be a total hater.

    Like when current news is a celebrities hair cut, when people update their facebook stats constantly but won't email you back because they've been too busy, and those stupid spammers.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Oh I agree with Cher on the annoying repetitive noises thing.

    People that play their music too loudly.

    People who ask me stupid questions that I have to answer (like my boss).

    Ummm my boss.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Smokers.

    People who don't yield for crosswalks.

    People who think that flashing their headlights will make you think they're in some important hurry and move out of their way. It makes me go slower you A-hole.

    ReplyDelete
  16. People who when you say hi to them as you pass on the sidewalk try to ignore you and can't even be bothered to life a muscle to smile. Happens all the time around these parts.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Gah, I hate allmost all of those thingz too!! Hate, hate, HaTe!!!

    wOOt.

    Ha.

    Except for Hugh Jackman. I had a dream I made out with him one night and it was quite tasty. Yes, a dream was tasty. Go figure.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Mosquitos and cockroaches? They serve no point and are just aweful. Oh, and flies and maggots too. No point at all.

    How about people who talk on their cell phones non-stop, even when they are interacting with another person and should be applying themselves to that?

    Oh, and leaf blowers. Loud, annoying, and bad for the environment. My neighbor has one and uses it for everything in his yard. Some day I will find and destroy it.

    ReplyDelete
  19. You pretty much covered everything i hate!
    -people who answer their phone when you are hanging out with them.
    -shallow b
    -skinny bitches who complain about being too fat

    ReplyDelete
  20. My phone keeps messing up my comments! Hugh jackman, though, is one sexy m---- f-----!!!

    ReplyDelete
  21. I'll take noisy and crying kids for a THOUSAND. So true.

    ReplyDelete
  22. Well, all these are certainly things we can complain about...along with many more. BUT...since I'm trying to learn to be more positive (like my hubby) we need to remember that for every thing we could complain about there are those things we can be thankful for...
    special people
    flowers in spring
    colored leaves in fall
    good food on the table
    answer to prayers
    politicians who really do care (OK, few & far between but there are one or two out there)
    charity when we need it
    chocolate
    little league ballgames
    AND SO MUCH MORE!!!!
    Have a great rest of the week...and focus on the good things!

    ReplyDelete
  23. you're officially my newfound soul mate.

    cuz I haTe PPl whO tyPe LiKe ThiS too.

    urgh. it takes too much time to type like that, like wtf?

    ReplyDelete
  24. The worst thing about Hugh Jackman being, of course, how his name comes so close to being a fabulously rude joke and yet falls so frustratingly completely short of one.

    ReplyDelete
  25. you've got a pretty exhaustive list there. I like to hate stores that discontinue my favorite product - and I like to hate that "funky" trend that suddenly becomes a trendy nightmare!!! Find your own dang trends - don't take my funk :(

    ReplyDelete
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    ReplyDelete
  27. Thanks for your post i like it.

    Share and like daily funny facebook post on your timeline.

    ReplyDelete

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