Welcome everybody to my commentary

I've got so much talent, it's a little scary

Is my every random thought insightful? Very

Not just entertaining- I'm a luminary

Neil Patrick Harris- Commentary! The Musical

Saturday, October 31, 2009

ScoMan's Gotta Do What ScoMan's Gotta Do...

Hello ScoFans!

Well, it's October 31st, do you know what that means?

Yup! It's my parents anniversary.

And it's today I've found a whole new respect for my father. For my mum's birthday in August he got her tickets to go and see John Farnham, who just happened to be performing on their anniversary. For those of you unfamiliar with John Farnham, women of "a certain age" love him, men everywhere despise him. But dad's going to endure it all for mum. Good on him.

That might not seem like much to most of you, but as someone who won't even go and see a movie with friends if it's got Will Ferrell in it (I know, there's been a lot of Ferrell bashing here lately) , sitting through a concert of someone you don't like for somebody else? .. Well that's just not something I would ever see myself doing. (Am I selfish? Yes)

Anyway, on with the REAL purpose of today's post..

Today is Halloween... everywhere in the world except in Australia and maybe some parts of the middle east. We don't celebrate it here. We never have. But after reading all of your blogs about Halloween and what you would be dressing as, it got me excited, and so I started the poll...

Seven votes for Dexter, with his nearest competition being two for "Supervillian".

Now normally, it'd be a no brainer, Dexter for sure.. but to the two of you who selected Supervillain perhaps you have friended me on Facebook, because you know I've had a different obsession lately.

After all, does Dexter have a blog?

No, he doesn't.

And long time followers will know I am a huge fan of the musical episode of Scrubs, so a supervillain with a musical blog.. now that's just.. wow...

But where could one find such a thing?

I think this year, I would totally be Dr Horrible.

With quotes like "The worlds a mess and I just have to rule it" and a side kick with the power to make things damp, Dr Horrible is a villain every one with dreams of world domination can look up to.

And it's not like the costume would be all that hard, which is great for those of us with short attention spans. And I do have a wicked smirk in my range, which any super villain would be proud of.

But then I ask myself, am I really a villain? Besides, the seagulls have already started activated their plans for world domination, so I may have missed the boat on that one.

So maybe I take the path of good. It comes with it's own rewards (even if ruling the world isn't one of them, there's still.. umm.. being admired and loved.. which is okay.. I guess. It'll have to do anyway). Maybe I play the hero of the tale, Captain Hammer.

With quotes like "Everyone can blaze a heroes trail, don't worry if it's hard, if you're not a friggin' 'tard you'll prevail" and the fact that he looks suspiciously like Nathan Fillion who I have already mentioned is one of my favourite actors, I guess there would be no shame in playing this hero.

But the difficult question still looms over my head. Am I a hero, or am I a villain? Which would be better suited to my first Halloween, should I have partaken in Halloween activities this year?

Well, before you decide which role you see me playing, you can watch this and then make your decision...

Well, hero or villain.. either way you get the groupies..

But maybe I don't have to decide between being a hero and being a villain. Maybe there's a reason I'm not sure which side of the line I'm one. Maybe I can walk the fine line between the two. What do they call that again?

Oh, that's right... "The Dexter Line"... (Wow, this blog just turned 360 degrees.. kind of)

"Am I a good person doing bad things? Or a bad person doing good things?"
Dexter Morgan

So ScoFans, what are you doing for Halloween? (those of you lucky enough to celebrate it)

And are you a hero? Or are you a villain?

For those of you who are interested (and why wouldn't you be?) I believe the three acts of Dr Horrible are all available on YouTube, or for those of you in America they're on the official website. Best 43 minutes you'll spend today.

Thursday, October 29, 2009

Facebook Fail Friday #5 - Say What?

Hello ScoFans!

Okay, I think this will be the last time I ask because I believe you only have a few opportunities left to vote, so head over again and vote for Daisy. Please. I'll be your friend.

And now, it's time for me to brighten your Friday with the post you look forward to the most.. another round of Facebook Fail Friday.

I was going to call in a translator to help out this week, but I forgot, so um.. we're on our own to try and work out what's going on..

Okay, I was with you until "Raven".. after that you lost me a little bit. I see the word "Sum" and the number "2" though, so I'm guessing it has something to do with maths. Maybe it's a really complicated equation that I just don't understand.

Okay. Thanks for weighing in on the discussion Eva. I think you're being supportive of your friend there. I'm not sure though. Maybe you're defending your own heart? Or maybe something else. I just.. I THINK something is broken somewhere (maybe your spellcheck)

Domo, I get the feeling "GotsHaters" isn't really your middle name. But maybe it should be, because I don't even know you and I'm hating you a little bit right now.. I do understand that you love me as you love all of your haters, but that just makes me hate you all the more.

Well Stephie, I hope you do. And please take Raven, Eva and Domo with you. I think you could all really benefit a lot, and so would society in general. All of us are slightly stupider from having read your statuses here today.

And finally, this guy I can understand, but it's still a "Say What?" moment, as well as being linked to the education theme which we seem to have wandered upon..

Saturday, October 24, 2009

Welcoming Our New Leaders

Hello ScoFans!

Remember, you only have about a week left to vote for Daisy. I know clicking your left mouse button twice and moving around the screen a bit is a lot to ask when I'm sure you have lots of other blogs to read, but she does need our help so let's all do our bit.

Now, the person who was supposed to write the fourth part of the story has in fact disappeared.. or is very angry with me, I don't know which. I'm sure I've never done anything in my life that would upset anybody, but it would explain her unresponsiveness.

So the story is being put on hold, so that I can welcome and show my support for our new leaders (or overlords if they would prefer).. the giant seagulls.

One of the giant seagulls made their presence known during a news telecast here on Wednesday night this week, and although they haven't been seen or heard from since, I think their motives are quite clear.

They are here to overpower us and rule the world.

And I would like to take this opportunity to say to any seagulls who might be reading this, that I can be quite a useful part of your operations.

For starters you can see at the top right bit of my screen there, that I have fifty nine followers. That's fifty nine people who will follow my instructions (shhh.. nobody correct me, I'm trying to fool the seagulls) That's fifty nine people who will do what you want them to do after you tell me what I want them to do.

And if you'd rather we used violence instead of manipulation and cult methodologies to take over the world, I'll just go on the record now as saying I have absolutely no problem with hitting small children.. in fact, the smaller the better.

Plus, fifty nine people.. I know it's not much, but it's more than New Zealand's army so that's a start isn't it?


I can also help you with your tax returns if you would like.. or better yet, if you want to develop a new tax system when you're in charge I could do that too. We could allocate all of the worlds funding for armies (so that they don't overpower you) to instead create giant statues for you to poop on.

Or is that only pigeons who enjoy that? Because if it is, I'm very sorry if I've offended you in anyway and please accept my most sincere apologies.

Another thing that you may be learning about me oh mighty seagulls, is that I am very non confrontational. I will always take the path of least resistance just because I really can't be bothered arguing, so if you want me to do something.. anything at all.. then I'll do it, I'll smile all the way through, and you won't hear a word of complaint out of me. Even when you're not around I won't complain, I'll talk you up because I wouldn't want word to get back to you that I've been saying bad things.

And seagulls, I have already ordered my new outfit which I hope to begin wearing to work by Wednesday or Thursday of this week..

I've never used the word "spineless" to describe myself, but if that's the word you want me to use, then that's the word I'll use from now on.

And so giant seagulls, I welcome you with open arms as the saviours and rulers of our planet. I look forward to working with you in the future, and I hope we can create a strong and solid bond that will be beneficial to everyone for years to come.

For anyone who wants to see the footage of the actual event occurring..

Thursday, October 22, 2009

Facebook Fail Friday #4- Family Matters

Hello ScoFans!

Okay, I won't bag Will Ferrell this time, but I will ask again that you all go and vote for Daisy. Do it every day. And if you have access to multiple computers, Blackberries or iPhones then vote multiple times a day.

Because if you don't, I'll kill you.

And now that you've done that (I assume), I'll reward you with some more Facebook Fails.

Now, I'm sure something that some of you are familiar with is when an older family member gets on Facebook and you start to worry about what is out there. Fortunately for Greg, he doesn't have this problem...

But Steven does have that problem. Steven probably should have sat down with Uncle Mike and had a talk to him when Uncle Mike added Steven to Facebook.

And now we visit with someone who wasn't lucky enough to escape his mum on Facebook. I say "escape", because his mum doesn't hold back.

By the time you're done insulting them Mrs Harris, I'm sure your son won't have any friends.

But that's not the only danger of adding a close relative to Facebook. Oh no, there's more ways it can come back to bite you.

You have to be careful who your friends are when you use some of these random applications.

Lastly, something pretty special. For the first time ever, I'm adding a contribution made by someone else to the Facebook Fail wall of shame. This was tweeted to me by Al of "just putting it out there..." (perhaps the first step to me becoming "That Facebook guy") and as soon as I saw it I knew it would fit this theme nicely..

If any of you have any Facebook Fails you'd like to contribute, there's always room for more so send them to my via any of the methods.. umm.. over there ==> somewhere. No, up a bit. A bit more. Yep, there. You found them.

Sunday, October 18, 2009

Sex and violence

Hello ScoFans!

Remember that time I pulled you screaming from that theater? Yeah sure, you remember, because I thought you were being held there against you will, and I was like "I'll save you" and you were like "But I want to stay! I like Will Ferrel!" and then I realised it was worse than I'd feared- you weren't being held against your will, you'd been brainwashed and so anyway then I locked you away from the world for awhile and managed to deprogram you and make you a sensible person again and save you from the horrors of having to sit through another Will Ferrel movie again?

Yeah, sure, you remember. Well before I get to this weeks post, which I know you all look forward to, I'm going to ask you to now to a favour for me. Because you do owe me.. "Step Brothers"! Come on, I totally saved you there. You owe me at least this much. Blogger, Tweeter, and all round nice person Daisy need our votes to help her get her dream job.We can vote once a day from each IP address we have access to, and it just takes a few clicks to make it happen. Just start by going here and then click "Vote now!" or whatever the vote button says. You can't miss it. And if you do this for her and she makes it to the next round of the interview process, then I will do something for you. All of you. Dance.. sing.. I don't know.. just make a fool of myself for your amusement. We'll discuss that when the time comes.

I've handed the third section of the story to one of my first followers, and my third longest serving follower. She too, seems to have disappeared from the bloggosphere (seriously, if I ever ask you to guest post for me just run and don't look back, it seems to be the kiss of death)

Anyway, Touching Joy is writing this part. I'd just like to remind everybody again, the sex and violence was not me. I was all innocent and just two sweet kids standing outside a club, but hand it over to the females and seriously it's like everything is sex and violence with girls.

I was personally hoping for some baking to break out.

The music inside was thumping. The bass beat danced with Kylie’s pounding heart as she heard herself mutter a string of nothings. She peered up at Constantos. He was at least two heads taller than she and at least triple her breadth. A sting whistled from her cheek where she had been scratched by the Promo Girl’s long, phony nails. Vulnerability overcame her and as the aggression melted away, Matthew took her hand and led her away.

Constantos spat at Kylie ‘s back and glared at the Promo Girl. She needed a good fuck to teach her a lesson. He , Constanos Fredrico Delgado, was not containable. “Woman, my office. Now.” His voice rang with authority. She shuffled towards the fire exit with a gruesome smile upon her face. He galloped closely behind her, ready to pounce.


Inside the club, the music turned sultry. She was there. Her hips seemed disconnected from her core as they shivered and shuddered to the rhythmatic thrusts of the music floating through the sticky air. Wet moonlight drifted in the skylight, bathing her slim figure in white radiance. As she trance-danced, the sticky wooden floor barely held her.

She was wearing low slung jeans and a backless silk chemise that hugged her sensual curves. The men at the bar were memorised by the sweat that trickled from the back of her neck down the centre line of her back until it drifted away. Her piercing eyes awoke to glance at the crystal Prada watch embracing her wrist and flounced off the floor towards the bar.

It was time.

The barman recognised her immediately as the wife of Constanos and slid the house favourite down the bar. She swept it up, downed it, and slipped unnoticed into the corridor towards Contantos’ office.

The hallway was glittering, dank and smelled of sex. Everything Constanos touched smelled of sex. Alexis had long grown tired of the promiscuity of the night life and had sought to end it the night previous.

Alexis had known of the affairs early in their marriage, but refused to be bothered by it. He provided her everything she needed. Prada, Gucci and Jimmy Choo kept her company until the kids arrived and her own emotional affairs began with the men she met around town. These men loved her and spoiled her with tender caresses. The worship was unfathomable. She had enjoyed her life this way for years until Constanos discovered the strange scent in his bedroom.

Constanos would have no such shame- being cuckolded and then divorced. His violent outburst had woken the kids and Alexis could no longer hide them from the abuse. She had to finally end it tonight- for good this time.

The door to Constanos’s office was jammed closed and heavy breathing echoed from behind the glass. That Promo Girl had done her job, alright. Alexis had half planned the love making early that morning when the Promo Girl had arrived at work. The power of suggestion had worked wonders.

Constanos hated to be thought of as a disgrace. Being walked in on by his wife mid-thrust would humiliate him with more success than any public debacle.

She pounded her body against the cold door and the jam cleared. The door swung open and Alexis calmly walked in.

“I’m leaving you Constanos. I’ve had enough.”

His eyes gleamed with anger

If you like what she wrote then head on over to her blog and tell her so. Hopefully she comes back. And the same goes for last weeks guest poster.

As for next weeks guest poster. She seems to have disappeared. She's not responding to anything I send. Oh well, we'll see how this all plays out

It adds a whole new element of suspense to the story. Will ScoMan find her before next Sunday? Will she have anything prepared to wrap this story up? Tune in next week to find out!

Thursday, October 15, 2009

Facebook Fail Friday #3 - The first (of many) relationship themes

Hello ScoFans!

Remember that time I pulled you screaming from that theater? Yeah sure, you remember, because I thought you were being held there against you will, and I was like "I'll save you" and you were like "But I want to stay! I like Will Ferrel!" and then I realised it was worse than I'd feared- you weren't being held against your will, you'd been brainwashed and so anyway then I locked you away from the world for awhile and managed to deprogram you and make you a sensible person again and save you from the horrors of having to sit through another Will Ferrel movie again? Yeah, sure, you remember.

Well before I get to the Facebook Fails, which I know you all love, I know they make your Friday's that little bit better, I'm going to ask you to now to a favour for me. Because you do owe me.. "Step Brothers"! Come on, I totally saved you there. You owe me at least this much.
Blogger, Tweeter, and all round nice person Daisy need our votes to help her get her dream job.

We can vote once a day from each IP address we have access to, and it just takes a few clicks to make it happen. Just start by going
here and then click "Vote now!" or whatever the vote button says. You can't miss it.

And if you do this for her and she makes it to the next round of the interview process, then I will do something for you. All of you. Dance.. sing.. I don't know.. just make a fool of myself for your amusement. We'll discuss that when the time comes.

And now, because you've all been so kind as to do that for me, I will share for you another round of Facebook Fails!

This week, we're looking at some relationship fails. There are dozens I have saved ready to deliver at some point, but we'll just work through them a handful at a time.

And we'll start with Gilly. Poor Gilly. Gilly is so in love with this girl, but I just don't think it's happening for him...

But wait! Maybe it's not all bad for Gilly!

Okay, phew. Gilly crisis over. If love can't work out between some dude and some chick who once had him blocked, what chance does anyone else have? Well, I think things may be terminal for Brandon. He.. he do bad..

But Brandon's not the only recently single on out there. Caitlynn too has recently found herself without a partner. But if Mike can help her, that won't last long..

So things aren't working out for Mike and Caitlynn either. Not a lot of sucess happening in the relationship world this week. How unfortunate.

But there's still Gilly. Gilly's still a shining beacon of "never give up" and "love is out there" that people everywhere can aspire to.

And I know there are some single ladies reading this. Some ladies who perhaps are interested in finding love. Well don't worry. I've got just the guy..

Only one chance though, so make it count.

Sunday, October 11, 2009

The Beautiful People

Hello ScoFans!

The story this week is continued by the talented author of "I'm having a moment"

She hasn't blogged much lately, but as she was my first follower and the influence for starting this blog after I hadn't written anything for a long time, I really wanted her to be a part of it and thankfully she agreed to help me out.

I say "thankfully" because she really took the story somewhere when I had just given her ramblings to start with..

So let's see where she takes it..

..the beautiful people just stride on past, noses in the air, looking..well..beautiful. The lights are flashing, the music is pumping, the atmosphere oozing with sex appeal, money, power. What most of those hopefuls still standing in the cue outside dont know, is that the beautiful people make this place. Why else would the "not-so-beautiful" want to get in? To make themselves feel beautiful.

The bouncer at the door is surrounded by two promo girls. At first glance, you see these two looking quite the sterotype - bubbly, early twenties, flashing their ultra-white veneered smiles, mini-mini dresses, clipboards in tow.
They hide a secret.

One of the promo girls whispers into the bouncers ear. Nods exchange. The bouncer unwillingly puts his hand over his left earpiece, and listens for some much needed information. A stern look. He grabs the promo girl by the arm and pulls her aside, towards the corner of the club's entrance. There looks like there's a disagreement. The tone of conversation heightens. The promo girl becomes distressed. She removes herself from the bouncers grip, and disappears down the tunnel to the eclectic flashing of bright lights-the beautiful people's playground. This looks suspicious to Kylie.

Walking through the club, the promo girl observes all the beautiful people, sipping on their beautiful cocktails, wines and beers, watching them shake their beautiful asses to the bass line, all in beautiful coordination. Everyone is mingling. Laughing. Flirting. It all looks the way it should be, but she is clouded by her own beautiful nightmare-which unfortunately involves the club.
She has gotten herself in too deep this time.

She makes her way towards the overstocked bar. She smiles coyly at the bartenders whilst slipping behind them and vanishes into a secret exit. It is here that you find the club's office. She knocks hesitantly on the door, and slithers in. She is gone for only a few short moments.
Everything is the way it should be..

You see, the promo girl is having an affair. This little fling has been happening for just a few months. It's normal for the promo girls-because It's happening with the club owner. Who is married. Who has kids. Who is extremly rich and powerful. Who has a overwhelming extended famous family. Who belongs to a secret kind of organization, the type you would never mess with.
She messed with it.
She got herself way too involved. She would visit the owners house at night begging to be let in. Looking desperately through windows, watching every movement of his wife and kids. She would follow him on his family outings out. She would call neurotically. She didn't understand this kind of affair. She wanted him to be hers. He explained time and time again. She didn't listen.
The wife got a gist of what was going on.

Meanwhile outside of the club. Kylie's curiousity was killing her. It had only been 15 minutes since the promo girl exited. Her gut was telling her there was something about to go down.

"Matthew..matthew! Did you see that before?" tapping him annoyingly on the shoulder.

"See what thing before?"

"That, that promo girl..with the bouncer..something's going down. We should check it out..?"

"What happens if this line moves? Then we'll miss our chance. And I'm going to miss my $50.."

"Fine," she pouted. "Wait here then."

"What are you doing..?! Come back here!"

Kylie swiftly ducks under the cue barrier and scurries behind the club. The dim lighting makes it hard to navigate. It's all damp on the brick work and the pavement is cold. It looks almost sinister. Squinting, she can see a hint of lighting. It looks like it's the back door of the club around the corner of the building. There's a few cars parked-luxurious expensive ones. Some dumpsters. There's also two people. Two people arguing. Kylie clings the the corner and peers around for a closer look. She can't see faces-but she can make out a voice. It's the promo girl.

"How could yo do this to me? You promised me that we were going to get married! You were going to get a divorce! I-"
A distinguished male voice abrubtly dominates and interuppts.
"Darling." the male says calmly. "I know I said those things. And I did mean them. But you are now interfering in things you shouldn't be interfereing in. How many times have I told you to keep your nose out of my affairs, huh? How many?! And yet you still embarrass me, embarrass my family..you're giving me a bad name.."

He continues to undermine her. Kylie listens on, feeling sympathetic. She suddenly gets grabbed from behind. She instantly leaps up from shock but blocks a scream. It's only Matthew. He thought that that was funny. She angrily gestures at him to hush, he straightens up, and they both slyly look around the corner.

"But, but, I-I just-"

A hard and cold slap is heard. The promo girl drops to the floor and starts to sob.

Kylie exchanges a sad look to Matthew, who is not quite sure what to make of the situation.

"I..I don't understand. I love you. I was trying to make things better..You're the married one after all..."

The promo girl has crossed the line. Her last sentence infuriates the male and he grabs her and pushes her against the wall. He throws a punch. The promo girls starts to wail.

Kylie, without thinking rushes out of the darkness. Matthew tries to pull her back, but it's too late. She lunges onto the unidentified male, and starts punching radically. The promo girl and Matthew both rush in, trying to pull their significant others of each other. It breaks up.

The unidentified male booms his distinguished voice at Kylie. He starts to hunch over her.

"Who do you think you are, spying on our conversation! And throwing punches!"

Matthew tries to play the dominant male by trying to protect kylie, stepping in front of her. As he moves into the light, he can see who this unidentfied male is. And he has identified him as the club's owner. Everybody knows him. Constantos bears even closer.

"What do you want huh? Money? Or are you just the losers who try to get in my club every weekend and don't?"
Kylie starts. "Well..."

Make sure to tune in next week when another loyal follower moves the story along. And remember, when I wrote the story it was just two losers trying to get into a club. She's the one that bought in the sex and violence.

Also notice I decided to put another Poll up, just for fun. I think you've got about two weeks to take a guess, and in about three weeks I'll give you the answer.

Thursday, October 8, 2009

Facebook Fail Friday #2- Is there a Doctor in the house?

Hello ScoFans!

Yes, Facebook Fail Friday* comes with it's own banner now.

I bet when I started this (last week) you were wondering how many of these I could come up with. Well, not only can I come up with lots, I can THEME these posts as well.

So this week, to make your Friday just that little bit easier, I have collected a group of Facebook Fails, none of which were posted by doctors (I'm guessing)

First of all is Alexander, who I think wins the bet, but loses the war.
If anything, you'll only get chicken pox, right Alex?

Next is Jody. When everyone was panicking about Swine Flu, Jody wasn't. At least, not until she found out one of the horrifying facts that the media tried to keep from us.
Wait, the media didn't keep that from us. They told us repeatedly. And look, there's Alexander again. Is it the same Alexander? I don't know.

Now we visit Jenn. Jenn is, as you can see, very excited.
Yes, that's right, she's so excited, he managed to switch genders. Good on them, I bet that's a first. I certainly haven't seen any cases like this in the medical journals (granted, I haven't read any medical journals)

Next, this ones for the mums out there. I know there are quite a few mums who read this, and mums are great people, so if I can do my little bit to make their day then I certainly will.
Now if your kids ever complain about your cooking, you can show them this so they know what happened to Gemma when she was all "My mum can't cook"

And saving my personal favourite for last, it seems Danica has done herself a mischief. Lets get the official word from her doctor as to exactly what injuries she suffered.

Sorry Danica, here in ScoMan's land, concussion or no concussion, a girl talking about her bruised scrotum is always funny (also note that she blamed her doctor for telling her she had a bruised scrotum).

And this week, I do have one freebie that is off theme. This one is for Stephanie who introduced me to the People of Walmart and for Speaking From The Crib where I am loving (and winning.. okay I won once) the weekly game where we make up captions for pictures from that site.

* Patent denied

Sunday, October 4, 2009

Outside the Nightclub

Hello ScoFans!

Okay, finally I'm going to start unleashing the story I told you about awhile back that I was working on with some of my loyal followers, which was all part of the celebration of my 100th post (this is my 123rd post, so I guess this was a long time coming)

It's not quite finished yet, but the first three parts are, and with any luck in four weeks the last part will be too.

The first part was written by myself. I set the scene and let them do the hard work. I'll tell you who each of them are as I introduce each part they've written.

“We’ve been here over an hour”

“I know, I know. We’ll get in soon”

“You say that every week, and we never get in”

Kylie. Every week she wants to come here just as badly as I do, but every week it’s my fault when we stand out the front in the cold all night. I don’t know what she expects though. We’ve lined up at this same club hundreds of times before and never been inside. Why should tonight be any different?

We’re nobodies. They don’t let nobodies into a place like this. I’m sorry if that sounded like I was complaining. I’m not really. I enjoy being a nobody. I enjoy being able to stand here unnoticed, and observe the people around me.

Watching the celebrities march right in.

Watching the VIPs getting their names marked off the list before being waved through.

And finally the beautiful people (all with dreams of being or banging a celebrity) occasionally being hand picked by the bouncers.

But we’re none of those things, so we stand in line with the rest of the cattle. Foolishly dedicated to the cause of looking foolish. We must make quite a sight for people passing by, or even the bouncers. You know the bouncers look at 98% of us and think “Not a chance in hell, but thanks for sticking around. Queues like this keep us being one of the hottest spots in town”

Kylie spoke up again.

“Can’t you try slipping the bouncers a fifty?”

“Do you know how many hundreds of dollars we’ve lost trying that in the past? They just smile, say thank you and tell us they consider us.. which they never do”

“Come on Matthew. It’s freezing out here, we have to at least try”

“Hey, no way am I wasting any more of our money with these guys”

But in the end I gave in. I always give in. So the next time a bouncer walked in our direction I had a word to him, gave him the old “shake of the hand” and got told we would be considered.

And then, without thinking twice, he let the young beautiful people in front of us in.

Next weeks installment will be written by D* of I'm having a moment...

Thursday, October 1, 2009

Facebook Fail Friday #1 - The Classics

"What's with all the death?"
Homer Simpson

Hello ScoFans!

Surprised to see me on a Friday? Well, I've decided to double my output. Two.. yes TWO posts per week.

Don't worry though, Facebook Fail Friday* (my new weekly segment, hence the #1) is not so much about words as it is about pictures. Here, let me explain in italics..

It's Friday. The weekend is almost here. You can feel the longing bouncing off everyone else and it's stressing you out (and your own longing added to the mix makes the day even longer) How will you ever survive? With a boost from Facebook Fail Friday. Have a quick giggle at someone else's expense to relieve some of the pressure before you get to relax through the weekend.

Okay, so now that's sorted, what exactly is a Facebook Fail you ask. A Facebook Fail is something I love very much. There are so many of them out there that give me a good laugh, and I decided it's time to start sharing them with the world.

I'll use some of the classics, and I'll show you how this is going to work...

"It's time to laugh again!"
Homer Simpson

First, let's all meet Tracy. Tracy is a girl who.. I don't know if she was new to Facebook, I'm not sure what her excuse was, but poor Tracy.. she revealed something to a much larger audience than she was anticipating (and the audience keeps getting larger)

You might need to click on the pictures to make them bigger..


Also note the "Engaged" on the left hand side of the screen there. I just hope she's engaged to Michael (though if not, this does become all the funnier for the rest of us).

The next one is an important lesson in remembering who your friends are.


Finally, I'm going to throw in one from my personal collection. Because it's not fair to only laugh at others without putting myself out there occasionally. I don't use the word "Owned".. well, ever.. but there's really no other way to describe what happened here.

PS. Geelong won.

* Patent pending