February Star #3 - Stephanie

Hello ScoFans!

It's another round of February Stars while I continue sitting on my ass and only doing a bit of an intro. It's a good gig. Anyway, rather than link back to the old February Stars every post. I've added a link on my sidebar there so those who have missed all the fun can click and go back, or those who have enjoyed the previous posts can go back and relive.

I've also added a poll for the chorus of our Drunken Blogger project. For those still wanting to contribute, you can click the link just under the banner and go back to the post and add your two cents.

On to today's guest post. The Valentines day post. And looking through my blogroll, I though Stephanie was the most qualified to give us a post about all things love. She's written quite a bit lately about her online dating experiences (some were very funny, some were less funny but much nicer for her)

And she hasn't let me down, by taking us through a journey of true love...

Love; Do you really know what real love is?

I wholly know what love is all about and no, I’m not being a braggart. And, with my wealth of knowledge on all things involving love I shall share a sweet, sweet tale of such.

See, Mom has been convinced for the longest I’m damaged goods, afraid of commitment. See, that’s where the old lady is wrong. Granted, I’ve never had some great romance, well a great reciprocated romance, but let’s not get technical because I do believe a one sided romance counts for something. Yes? C’mon, really, I’ve had some major highs and lows, yet remained entirely devoted to many a man who seemed to not be…well we’re not getting technical, right?

Okay, so love is my specialty, which has been confirmed through the relationship with my charming, little darling, Timmy. Timmy is no man, child or relative. Timmy is a furry, four legged stink bomb of a canis lupus familiaris, or dog for short.

Now hold on one hot second. Before you get weird-ed out thinking this going to be some sort of peanut butter party, bestiality (another one with the bestiality.. first Daisy and maybe OmegaRadium and now this. Why must you people turn my blog into a home of animal sex stories? - ScoMan) sorta post, hold up. I’m talking about my beloved pet here, you sick son of a bitch! My feelings for young Timmy are innocent, pure, and completely unconditional.

Case in point:

Fast asleep, snuggled under the covers with my then boyfriend, I abruptly awoke to a strange, yet familiar scent in the air.

*sniff, sniff*
*sniff, sniff*

The distinct smell in the air confused me; did the boyfriend fart…did I fart…did the dog fart…what the hell!? I found the smell to be too strong to bear.

Although completely and utterly atypical, I decided and said ever so quietly to myself, “Ah, the dog must’ve shit in the living room”.

As I unwillingly peeled back covers to start my investigation, I noticed the texture and temperature of my comforter had changed. See, I’d just put my hand in dog shit, steaming hot, mushy dog diarrhea to be exact.

“Goddamnfuckingshit!” passed through my sleepy, suddenly irritated head, “Timmy shit the bed!”

Mind you, my apartment did not have washing and drying capabilities, so what else was I to do other than wake the then boyfriend, advising him to next make any sudden moves. Of course, with a weak stomach, he was of no help.
Considering it was the middle of the night, I was tired and all laundry mats were closed, I didn’t want to take a shit crusted comforter to the laundry mat 12 plus hours later when I got out of work at 5PM which would be followed by a two hour night class, I removed the comforter, carrying it into the bathtub for a good warm rinse.

Not once did I yell, scream, hit or threaten to disown my Timmy. No man or animal is exempt from a case of the bubble guts. During this hard time, my feeling didn’t falter. I exhibited nothing, but patience, acceptance and understanding, and that, my friends, is love.

Stephanie is the taller of the two, and the other, by process of elimination must be Timmy. Don't they look great together?

Wasn't that a great post though? Well, you can read more of Stephanie's stuff over at her blog Not the Oxygen. Do it. You know you want to.

February Stars #2 - OmegaRadium

Hello ScoFans!

Remember you can check out Daisy, the last February star here. Not a lot of people got there the other day. Go now. Don't make me hurt you.

Today's post is interesting. It's interesting in that.. I haven't read it. I have no idea what he talks about. He could be saying all sorts of mean stuff about me in there. But, when he started with a warning about Dexter Series 4 spoilers, I had to close my eyes and look the other way. And then I realised I could just close the window, which was hard to do with my eyes closed.

I will tell you though he is a great blogger. His posts are always interesting and he is great with words. But again, I'll let the post speak for itself. So here he is.. OmegaRadium...

The Women Who Change Us

*****DEXTER Season 4 SPOILER ALERT!!*****
IF YOU HAVEN'T FINISHED DEXTER SEASON 4, STOP READING NOW!
*****DEXTER Season 4 SPOILER ALERT!!*****

Hello ScoFans!

I'm OmegaRadium from the "Differential Diagnosis" blog and I'm here to deliver a special message to the readers. Despite what ScoMan may want you to believe, not all of us on the blogosphere are super models blogging in our spare time away from the New York & Paris runways. Well, at least not initially...

I don't believe I was ever a super attractive kid by any means. Sporting a Jim Carey “bowl cut” from “Dumb & Dumber” for much of my pre-high school years certainly didn't win me any fashion awards!

Throughout high school, I found myself lacking in my clothing style, my hairstyle, and even my smile, which in turn affected my confidence. Of course, I was completely clueless how I would remedy these issues, until I met this one girl. Sure, she broke my heart, but before all the heartache and tears, she cared enough about me to help set me straight and mold me into what would eventually become a better man.

As our love slowly blossomed over the years, so did my style. I ditched the glasses, changed my hair, and began wearing more "acceptable" clothes. The change wasn’t just physical, I mentally felt more confident and as a result, I slowly came out of my shell. I felt great, like a new person, and many of the same girls who wouldn't give the old me the time of day before, suddenly wanted to "get to know me better."

Nothing boosts a man's confidence more than having to turn down/reject a female's advances, especially one whom he'd have given anything to attract just years prior.

One of the most important things I've learned from these helping females is to, "MAKE AN EFFORT" to be who you want to be. When you make an effort to look nice, people will notice. Little things such as ironing your clothes, keeping your hair nice and neat, moisturizing, trimmed nails, and a clean shaven face can go a long way.

I guess the main point of this post is to thank all the females reading this for the time & effort they've put into helping their own boyfriends, ex-boyfriends, and any other men in their lives, towards becoming a better man. It's because of you caring females that this former "nerd" has evolved into a more "date-able" bachelor.

Why do I bring this up? Well, thanks to several of my friend's recommendations, and ScoMan's constant tweeting & blogging about Dexter, I finally gave in and started Dexter Season 1. Two months later, I finish watching Dexter Season 4.

*****DEXTER Season 4 SPOILER ALERT!!*****
IF YOU HAVEN'T FINISHED DEXTER SEASON 4, STOP READING NOW!
*****DEXTER Season 4 SPOILER ALERT!!*****

The realization of Rita’s untimely death at the hands of the “Trinity" killer truly broke my heart. Rita, like most women, just wanted what was best for her man. She helped bring Dexter out of his shell and slowly morphed him from a recluse into a full blown family man. Not your typical family man mind you, but she played a huge role in improving his quality of life nonetheless.

Sure the heartbreak sucked, and we may never truly get over it, but in the end, these caring women give us so much more than they could ever take by paving the way for us to become better men, and in turn have even better relationships in the future. So, thanks ladies! Rest in peace Rita Morgan.

Thanks for making your man a better man!














Yes I did press enter like 10 times to make sure I didn't read any of the end of the post. It's weird posting an entry here that I know nothing about. But I do know about his post "Dodging Bullets" that I quite enjoyed.

Thanks again OmegaRadium. I'm sure the post was brilliant.

I'll read it next Thursday, I promise.

Tune in on Sunday for my next February Star. Until then, make sure you check out the two already featured. Oh, and don't forget you can still contribute to the "Drunken Blogger" thing at the top of the screen.

Sex and violence

Hello ScoFans!

Remember that time I pulled you screaming from that theater? Yeah sure, you remember, because I thought you were being held there against you will, and I was like "I'll save you" and you were like "But I want to stay! I like Will Ferrel!" and then I realised it was worse than I'd feared- you weren't being held against your will, you'd been brainwashed and so anyway then I locked you away from the world for awhile and managed to deprogram you and make you a sensible person again and save you from the horrors of having to sit through another Will Ferrel movie again?

Yeah, sure, you remember. Well before I get to this weeks post, which I know you all look forward to, I'm going to ask you to now to a favour for me. Because you do owe me.. "Step Brothers"! Come on, I totally saved you there. You owe me at least this much. Blogger, Tweeter, and all round nice person Daisy need our votes to help her get her dream job.We can vote once a day from each IP address we have access to, and it just takes a few clicks to make it happen. Just start by going here and then click "Vote now!" or whatever the vote button says. You can't miss it. And if you do this for her and she makes it to the next round of the interview process, then I will do something for you. All of you. Dance.. sing.. I don't know.. just make a fool of myself for your amusement. We'll discuss that when the time comes.

I've handed the third section of the story to one of my first followers, and my third longest serving follower. She too, seems to have disappeared from the bloggosphere (seriously, if I ever ask you to guest post for me just run and don't look back, it seems to be the kiss of death)

Anyway, Touching Joy is writing this part. I'd just like to remind everybody again, the sex and violence was not me. I was all innocent and just two sweet kids standing outside a club, but hand it over to the females and seriously it's like everything is sex and violence with girls.

I was personally hoping for some baking to break out.


The music inside was thumping. The bass beat danced with Kylie’s pounding heart as she heard herself mutter a string of nothings. She peered up at Constantos. He was at least two heads taller than she and at least triple her breadth. A sting whistled from her cheek where she had been scratched by the Promo Girl’s long, phony nails. Vulnerability overcame her and as the aggression melted away, Matthew took her hand and led her away.

Constantos spat at Kylie ‘s back and glared at the Promo Girl. She needed a good fuck to teach her a lesson. He , Constanos Fredrico Delgado, was not containable. “Woman, my office. Now.” His voice rang with authority. She shuffled towards the fire exit with a gruesome smile upon her face. He galloped closely behind her, ready to pounce.

....

Inside the club, the music turned sultry. She was there. Her hips seemed disconnected from her core as they shivered and shuddered to the rhythmatic thrusts of the music floating through the sticky air. Wet moonlight drifted in the skylight, bathing her slim figure in white radiance. As she trance-danced, the sticky wooden floor barely held her.

She was wearing low slung jeans and a backless silk chemise that hugged her sensual curves. The men at the bar were memorised by the sweat that trickled from the back of her neck down the centre line of her back until it drifted away. Her piercing eyes awoke to glance at the crystal Prada watch embracing her wrist and flounced off the floor towards the bar.

It was time.

The barman recognised her immediately as the wife of Constanos and slid the house favourite down the bar. She swept it up, downed it, and slipped unnoticed into the corridor towards Contantos’ office.

The hallway was glittering, dank and smelled of sex. Everything Constanos touched smelled of sex. Alexis had long grown tired of the promiscuity of the night life and had sought to end it the night previous.

Alexis had known of the affairs early in their marriage, but refused to be bothered by it. He provided her everything she needed. Prada, Gucci and Jimmy Choo kept her company until the kids arrived and her own emotional affairs began with the men she met around town. These men loved her and spoiled her with tender caresses. The worship was unfathomable. She had enjoyed her life this way for years until Constanos discovered the strange scent in his bedroom.

Constanos would have no such shame- being cuckolded and then divorced. His violent outburst had woken the kids and Alexis could no longer hide them from the abuse. She had to finally end it tonight- for good this time.

The door to Constanos’s office was jammed closed and heavy breathing echoed from behind the glass. That Promo Girl had done her job, alright. Alexis had half planned the love making early that morning when the Promo Girl had arrived at work. The power of suggestion had worked wonders.

Constanos hated to be thought of as a disgrace. Being walked in on by his wife mid-thrust would humiliate him with more success than any public debacle.

She pounded her body against the cold door and the jam cleared. The door swung open and Alexis calmly walked in.

“I’m leaving you Constanos. I’ve had enough.”

His eyes gleamed with anger

If you like what she wrote then head on over to her blog and tell her so. Hopefully she comes back. And the same goes for last weeks guest poster.

As for next weeks guest poster. She seems to have disappeared. She's not responding to anything I send. Oh well, we'll see how this all plays out

It adds a whole new element of suspense to the story. Will ScoMan find her before next Sunday? Will she have anything prepared to wrap this story up? Tune in next week to find out!