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Sunday, November 2, 2008

The Girl at the Place Where I Pay My Rent

Because I am incredibly lazy, I will from time to time post some of my favourite blogs from old sites here rather than write all new blogs. This at the time I wrote it, was enjoyed by most who read it. I hope you enjoy it too.

Every two weeks on a Thursday afternoon during my lunch hour, I stroll up the street and pay my rent for that fortnight. Usually I am greeted by the same girl, who of course needed my name each time I made my payment in order to fill out the receipt.

After three or four lunch hour journeys to pay my rent, the young lady had my name memorised and it felt sort of weird, as I didn't know her name. Each time I walked in to the office she would greet me with a smile and a "Hi Joe!" (my name is not actually Joe for those of you who don't know.. this is an alias I am providing in order to conecal my identity from the Internet stalkers.. yeah that's right.. I'm stalkable.. trust me.. don't laugh..) and all I could say in reply was "Ahh.. yeah.. hi"

This grew even more uncomfortable when I would see her in the street, and she would smile and "Hi Joe" and all I could reply with was "Yeah, how's it going?" So perplexed was I by this situation, I even considered asking her her name just so I know.. but that also felt a little weird considering she's known my name for like 4 months now and I have no idea what her's is. Besides, just asking is no fun. It takes all the thrill out of knowing away. It's all about tactics, planning, and the ability to think on your feet.

And then today came. The second Thursday.. my rent was due. I walked into the office per usual and was greeted with the smile and the "Hi Joe!" to which I replied with my customary "Hey, how's it going?" and went through the motions that we have down to a fine art.

She pulled out the receipt book and prepared the receipt

I got my hard earned but soon to be departed with money out of my wallet

Small talk small talk small talk

She goes to hand the receipt over to me as I go to hand the money over to her

The phone rings...

I pull back the money and smilie and say "You better get that.."

She gives me a weird look and picks up the phone..

"Hello, XYZ and associates, Jane speaking" (again, the company is not really named XYZ and associates and her name was not really Jane.. the actuals names are not an important part of what happened and therefore have been replaced in order to minimise stalkers).. I smiled.. I finally got her..

She finished her phone call and we went back to where we were (although she was somewhat more confused than before). She handed me the receipt, I handed her the cash.

"Seeya next time Joe"

"Seeya Jane"

The look of confusion returns to her face and then the whole scenario clicks in her head. She realised that everything I had done had been for a reason and she finally realised what everbody
else needs to learn...

You can't beat me. Ever. In the long run I will always get the information I desire through whatever means possible. Remember that loyal readers, and in future just don't even bother trying...


  1. HAHAHA! I love this. I wasn't sure where you were going with it and then LOLd when it was just that you "got her". thanks for the laugh.

  2. wicked you are..... wicked is GOOD. I thought you were going to borrow her purse long enough to go through her personal information.

  3. smooth. If I ever tried that it wouldn't work out as well.

  4. good stuff!! I love it! good thing she was one of those "phone greeters" you know?


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