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I've got so much talent, it's a little scary

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Not just entertaining- I'm a luminary

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Saturday, October 24, 2009

Welcoming Our New Leaders


Hello ScoFans!

Remember, you only have about a week left to vote for Daisy. I know clicking your left mouse button twice and moving around the screen a bit is a lot to ask when I'm sure you have lots of other blogs to read, but she does need our help so let's all do our bit.

Now, the person who was supposed to write the fourth part of the story has in fact disappeared.. or is very angry with me, I don't know which. I'm sure I've never done anything in my life that would upset anybody, but it would explain her unresponsiveness.

So the story is being put on hold, so that I can welcome and show my support for our new leaders (or overlords if they would prefer).. the giant seagulls.


One of the giant seagulls made their presence known during a news telecast here on Wednesday night this week, and although they haven't been seen or heard from since, I think their motives are quite clear.

They are here to overpower us and rule the world.


And I would like to take this opportunity to say to any seagulls who might be reading this, that I can be quite a useful part of your operations.

For starters you can see at the top right bit of my screen there, that I have fifty nine followers. That's fifty nine people who will follow my instructions (shhh.. nobody correct me, I'm trying to fool the seagulls) That's fifty nine people who will do what you want them to do after you tell me what I want them to do.

And if you'd rather we used violence instead of manipulation and cult methodologies to take over the world, I'll just go on the record now as saying I have absolutely no problem with hitting small children.. in fact, the smaller the better.

Plus, fifty nine people.. I know it's not much, but it's more than New Zealand's army so that's a start isn't it?


** UPDATE I LOST ONE FOLLOWER WHILE I WAS DRAFTING THIS. RATHER THAN GO BACK AND CHANGE ANY NINES TO EIGHTS, I'VE LEFT IT AT NINE AND ADDED THIS BIT BECAUSE I COULDN'T BE SURE I'D GET ALL THE NINES**

I can also help you with your tax returns if you would like.. or better yet, if you want to develop a new tax system when you're in charge I could do that too. We could allocate all of the worlds funding for armies (so that they don't overpower you) to instead create giant statues for you to poop on.

Or is that only pigeons who enjoy that? Because if it is, I'm very sorry if I've offended you in anyway and please accept my most sincere apologies.

Another thing that you may be learning about me oh mighty seagulls, is that I am very non confrontational. I will always take the path of least resistance just because I really can't be bothered arguing, so if you want me to do something.. anything at all.. then I'll do it, I'll smile all the way through, and you won't hear a word of complaint out of me. Even when you're not around I won't complain, I'll talk you up because I wouldn't want word to get back to you that I've been saying bad things.



And seagulls, I have already ordered my new outfit which I hope to begin wearing to work by Wednesday or Thursday of this week..



I've never used the word "spineless" to describe myself, but if that's the word you want me to use, then that's the word I'll use from now on.

And so giant seagulls, I welcome you with open arms as the saviours and rulers of our planet. I look forward to working with you in the future, and I hope we can create a strong and solid bond that will be beneficial to everyone for years to come.

For anyone who wants to see the footage of the actual event occurring..










10 comments:

  1. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I love it! I laughed and laughed. First - your words are freakin hilarious - and then to top it all off and watch the video at the end HAHAHAHAHA!

    AND since I'm a follower of you - that must mean I'm also a follower of the seagulls too - SWEET!!! So to honor our new leaders ... behold - my offering to the seagulls - my photography skillz of their beauty:

    http://www.flickr.com/photos/27168615@N03/4041604376/

    Feel free to use it if you ever have need to post more seagull pics. :)

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  2. That's, erm...different. Why was there a giant seagull on the news?

    I don't want the world to be run by birds...unless you mean women, which I wouldn't particularly like either, unless you mean me.

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  3. Who in the right mind will unfollow you, Sco?

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  4. ok i voted for daisy and i don't even know what it's about our who daisy is b/c i am far too lazy and far too behind in my blog reading/comments and so that should be a testament to the giant birds that your followers will indeed do anything you tell them now i am off to catch up on my facebook fails

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  5. Man, I've told you once, I'll tell you again, ain't no stinkin birds gonna rule the world. It's gonna be me. ME I tell you. Not you, not birds. ME! A hillbilly. And officially I've just blown my plan by bursting out against this post that birds, let alone seagulls ruling the world.

    Guess you either have to die, or join me in my fight to take over the world one town at a time...

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  6. I first saw that footage on the 7pm Project on channel 10. It was hilarious, but then every other channel showed it the following day, by then it was boring.

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  7. And my family thinks I'm nuts for being afraid of birds. The animals are trying to take over the world!

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  8. I see you commenting on some of the blogs I follow.
    Finally figured I'd check you out.
    Might just stick around awhile and see what you got.
    Then you won't have to change those 9's to 8's.

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  9. I will follow you my seagull leader. Please don't ask me to drink koolaide and visit foreign planets with you. Thanks for visiting us today. Happy Tuesday! Holly at lifelaughlatte.blogspot.com

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